Uncertainty

I can’t help but wonder, what is my true purpose? The decision was made to postpone the announcement of who will advance in the competition until after the 4th of July holiday. The announcement will be made on July 6th at 9am PST. A dramatic conference call is the medium of choice. 271 authors will cram a crowded conference line to hear the names of the chosen 25. Is this really what I am here to do? Go public with my message or am I of more help sitting alone in a dark room praying for the healing of souls? At this moment, I honestly do not know and so am open to serving in either capacity. God knows how I am most useful. My life has had purpose all along and it will continue to do so. The trick is can I live as if I know this and enjoy the process. I have lots of questions today. These are uncertain times. I still believe that an open heart is the anti-dote to a fearful existence. So I am allowing myself to feel the ambiguity of it all without judging it as good or bad. Next week will reveal a whole new set of feelings. My purpose is clear: to feel fully whatever comes my way without judgment and experience the inherent joy of un-resisted emotions. There is no pain in a feeling that is experienced with compassion.